We have all been hurt in our lives by somebody else. We have also caused hurt towards other people, whether it was intentional or not. The kind of hurt that can be inflicted upon somebody can be either physical or mental hurt. Both are equally painful and when we experience pain from someone else, it can be hard to give that person a second chance with your trust. When we are kids we often hold grudges for a long time. Remember when you used to be friends with someone and they would do something small to offend you? Then you would say to them, “I’m not your friend anymore.” As a kid, you never really understand much about forgiveness because everything seems black and white. As an adult, we tend to rationalize things out more to the point where forgiveness may be given to someone after an extended period of time.

We are all capable of change if we realize the error of our ways. That is why every society on earth has prisons. These are institutions that keep criminals in a confined area for a certain amount of time in order to rehabilitate them. Then when they are released it is their second chance to prove to society that they are a changed person. In some cases when a prisoner’s sentence is not up yet, a parole board has to decide if the prisoner has changed enough to be let into society early. Their decision to give the prisoner a second chance comes from an evaluation of their characteristics and attitude during their time of confinement. If it looks like they have made significant progress to be nonviolent and trustworthy, then they are given a second chance.

Not everybody is a criminal though. Sometimes people in the civilized world make unethical mistakes and deserve second chances as well. Perhaps you cheated or lied to your spouse and they don’t trust you anymore. Do you think you would deserve a second chance in this situation? It would depend on whether you wanted to change and have apologized for your previous actions. If you made a mistake that you regret then the only thing you can do is try to prove to your family and friends that you won’t ever do it again.

Chances are if you don’t have a track record of lying to your loved ones then they will probably give you a second chance with few reservations. However, if you have been given multiple chances already then you probably won’t get another. Remember a second chance means that you have only messed up one time and the person is giving you a new chance to redeem yourself. If you have already been given this second chance then there won’t be any more second chances after that. Why would there be? If you promised somebody that you would never hurt them again and then you hurt them anyway, of course they won’t give you another chance. We should all be entitled to make one big mistake in our lives that will be forgiven. But don’t think since you were given a second chance that you will be given more chances, because you won’t. After your first mistake you should do everything you can to be better in the future.

Not just for your sake but for everyone around you that you care about. They may give you a second chance out of the love and respect that have for you, but that love and respect will diminish if you keep on disappointing them. Make sure you don’t let any second chance go to waste.

People may want second chances from strangers or acquaintances too. Besides a prison setting where you get evaluated for a second chance by strangers, you may come across a situation in your workplace where you get evaluated for one as well. Everybody has messed up while working at their job. This is the one place where second chances are crucial. If you have an employee that normally does good work but messed up one time, then they deserve a second chance to make up for it. However, if you have an employee that constantly slacks off and doesn’t do any work then they might not even deserve a second chance. No matter what setting a person is in, they have to prove themselves to others before they can deserve a second chance.

After all, second chances have to be earned. They cannot just be given away out of generosity. There are people who expect second chances, so they use that as an excuse to perform lousy at what they do. Make sure you don’t give people like this a second chance. Only those who rightful deserve one should get it.

You may think that everybody deserves a second chance because we are all simply human and we make mistakes. That is a very commendable and ethical way to think, but not everybody thinks that way. It is really up to the individual to decide on who gets a second chance or not. We all have different levels of generosity and kindness when it comes to giving people chances. There are those who don’t trust anybody and will not give second chances, regardless of their past performance. Then there are other kinds of people who are too trusting and will keep giving people chances, even if they never change their negative ways.

You have to decide which kind of person that you want to be. Evaluate the people around you and ask yourself if they are the kinds of people who deserve second chances. Everyone’s answer will vary for sure because it has to do with the type of people you associate with and how much you have personally been let down by them in your life. But, you shouldn’t let your past experiences influence your judgments on people you know in the present. Good people can make mistakes just like bad people can. It is up to you to decide who did it intentionally and who didn’t. The one who did should get the second chance while the one who didn’t should not get one. Makes sense, right?

 

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