We all strive to live our lives to the fullest. Our concepts and ideas of living life to the fullest greatly vary. Materialism lends happiness to some in the form of objects while others feel a sense of content with the tiniest deeds of goodness. Attaining fulfillment involves three core elements – the Body, Mind and Spirit. Their integrity and congruence allows you to have a meaningful relationship with yourself and others. To be one on the inside necessitates fastening yourself with yourself and one such way of doing so is honoring your promises.
Life is so Simple, You won’t even understand it
There are a few secrets to life. You unlock those and you pave the way to life filled with shades of harmony, content, and fulfillment. One such secret ingredient is the act of honoring your promises. It sounds simple but in reality is one of the toughest principles to maintain.
Do you know it only takes a solid and integrated self to keep a promise? Do you know that honoring your promise is an indication of a high self esteem and self respect? Do you know that one of the ways of ‘giving back’ is coordinating your words and your action? There are many questions about happiness, and they are fairly basic concepts, but because life is so simple: it goes beyond your understanding.
Honoring your Promises and Congruence
Congruence is a popular concept that was put forward by the Humanist Carl Rogers. He spoke about self actualization and the relationship between the ideal and real self. Congruence indicates a state of ‘being one with yourself.’ Therefore when who you want to or strive to be (ideal self) equates your actual behavior (real self), you are likely to work at your utmost potential. Self actualization makes you rise above the daily needs and desire and you start to function in a competent and self aware manner.
Roger states that when an individual is integrated on the inside, they become fully functional. How is this theory of Rogers applicable to the idea of promises? Well, only someone who is true to the self has managed to achieve inner peace and truly knows what he wants from life and has attained many things: will be capable of honoring his promises and feeling satisfied. Interestingly enough, the link between congruence and honoring promises is like a loop. If you learn to honor your words, that will slowly bud into congruence.
Honoring your Promises and Transcending
Have you felt that you can keep your words without much effort? Does it happen that it comes naturally to you to base your actions and behavior on your words? If so, then you have reached a point that is well above Rogers’ self actualization. The highest and most exalted virtue is that of transcendence and it helps one connect with life and make it more meaningful.
When you transcend, you grow above and beyond the worldly needs. How is the concept of transcendence related to the idea of promises? When you rise above, you connect better with yourself. You connect better with your good side and your good self. When you keep your words and honor your promise that indicates that you have risen above many things and you have nothing to lose. Imagine the feeling of knowing that you have nothing to lose. You will always be in a win win situation without ever going astray from your words.
Honoring your Promises and Trust
‘Actions speak louder than words.’ We have all heard this phrase and silently agree with it as well. What you say (the words) only make up a small proportion of you. What you do is the final word on who you really are.
Take this as an example: a friend tells another that they will always be there for them, through good and bad and thick and thin and the like. Once these words are put to test, and the friend fails to be a friend in deed, then the foundation of the friendship faces a crack. The crack emanates distrust and dishonesty. Therefore when you fail to honor your promise, your character suffers a black mark.
Even though many people might state that they live for themselves and wouldn’t be affected much or care about others. For them, opinions of others might contain no value. However in reality they fail to realize that their carefree attitude is a way to avoid feelings of guilt. Deep down even they know that gaining acceptance from others is important. It is important to evolve and grow and learn to be an individual. However, because they are not congruent, honest, and in-synch with themselves, they fail to attain fulfillment in life.
Honoring your Promises and Commitment
When taking the vows, it’s all a game of words. Sticking together in sickness and in health and the like are plain words. They have no meaning unless every bone of the speaker truly means it. To be involved with entirety in the words, one needs to be committed. Only very strong individuals are highly committed. They are those who know that their words are like a commitment and to live by their words is similar to attaining fulfillment in life.
Honoring your Promises with the Self and Others
When we think of the phrase ‘honor your promise,’ we generally think of keeping our words and promises that we make with others. If you promise to spend time with a friend, honoring your promise in this instance would indicate the need to visit the friend or call them up someday. As much as honoring promises is for others, it is also for one’s own self.
When you stick to your words, you give yourself a tiny bit of happiness. You give yourself a reason to believe that you are a good individual. You silently tell yourself that your life has a meaning and that you are heading in the right direction.